A Volatile Post, Perhaps?
First off, I wanted to thank everyone for your thoughts and recommendations on my last post about Darsie and making friends. We've made some great strides in the last week and hopefully it will continue.
I have a topic I've been thinking about for awhile and am hoping to get other parents/people to contribute on - handicap parking placards.
Darsie is very able. But walking does wear her out more so than typical people. And she walks slowly. According to the Washington State web site on the matter, I do believe that she would qualify - Your ability to walk is severely limited due to an arthritic, neurological, or orthopedic condition.
I know that it would make our lives so much easier. But then I get to thinking, would it make Darsie's life easier or just mine? I'm thinking of shorter jaunts across parking lots with the three kids and being closer to our destinations. I think about all the people that use placards that don't "appear" to need one (although, as with Darsie, not all conditions are visible). I know that she doesn't really need one and so for the time being, we've held off on applying for one.
And as I say that, I know that if and when it would really benefit her, we'll be the first ones in line for a placard.
25 comments:
Just because you have one, doesn't mean that you have to use it. If there are times when you know that the walk would be hard for her (busy mall), then I think it is worth it. My dad has one because of a number a replaced and/or wearing out joints after years of manual labor. He only uses it when he needs it.
I think Amelia makes a good point. There are times where you might need it - then the only parking options are really too far for her to walk or the handicap spaces. I am thinking of things like state fairs, malls, etc where there are a LOT of people and cars. Maybe get one for those special times?
My mom got me one for the very same reason, and if I got tired enough she'd have to carry me across the parking lot. So yes there are times when they're for children & parents. And doctors won't disagree with you on this. Especially if you have other children with you it can become a safety issue. You can always get one and not use it. Like if there's a close space than park there. If not use the placard.
I guess I just feel bad that sure, we could park closer, but she is still going to have to walk around the grocery store/mall/etc.. You know? However, I really don't want her to suffer because of me and my thoughts. It isn't a pride issue. If she/we need it, we need it. I just think of the people that really really do need it and it wouldn't just be convenient at times, you know?
I think "helping the caregiver who has to help the person" DEFINITELY qualifies. You're not trying to cheat the system here, like a teenaged boy borrowing his grandma's car so he can park in the handicapped zone: this is what these zones/cards ARE FOR. And even if you have one, it doesn't mean you always have to use it: on a day that you feel you and she can walk the distance fine, then you can park elsewhere---but you have it for other times, when it would really not be fine.
I think anything that makes life a little easier is worthwhile. Get it.
After reading the comments, I'd add that you could also modify depending on available parking. There are some lots that will have, like, a dozen handicapped spaces and only one is being used---and others where there are only two places and both have wheelchair vans in them. I think the whole thing can be as-needed or case-by-case.
We have one, and I have to admit, it was hard for me to get. I still feel a twinge of something (sadness?) when I use it. I KNOW that's my issue . . . that I HAVE to come to terms with the "my child has a disability" thing, but I still hate it. It still makes my stomach do flip flops when I use it.
Okay so now that I've rambled, I'll say this - Sam is still young (and can't walk) but she's young enough that we'd likely have her in a stroller most of the time anyway, so we don't always "need" it. But, she also has 6+ therapy sessions a week and in our city, parking at every one of those sessions costs. So we were spending 40+ dollars a week to park at therapy. Disabled parking is free. So, we got the placard. And, at first, because of the stomach-flip-flopping thing, I swore I'd only use it at therapy, but I've expanded. I still park in regular spots if they are available, but if for instance, I leave the stroller at home (it happens) or I'm planning to put Sam in a cart in the store so I don't want to use the stroller or whatever, I use it when we are just "out and about" too.
ok so i delayed tot his one lol.
Well you make a valid point sharon so I am going to offer you my words being a 25 year old youn women with cerebral palsy ver similar t Ds. I have spastic dipligia.
i have had a placard since i was about four years old there are many reasons for this. i am also visually impaired But I know that D is in AFOS and those can be very heavy and tiring to walk in and yes we do get tired and it will only continue to gradually tire her out more as she ages or that is my expereince.
i went out todya with a family member and did not have my card. i did well at teh time of the outing but now as i am here typing this long but hopefully helpful post I am having muscle spasms like crazy.
she sould wualify and honestly i am surprised that her orthopedic doctor did not recomend it to you mine did for me and not only because my mom had me The handicapped child and i say taht wil love and compassion but also because he was concerned for all of our safety with mom trying to watch me and two older sisters so yes i do agree that it will help D along with Being convinient to you and dotn feel bad because D needs thos spots too. i see no reason you should feel guilty. i have firends with CP that i have told that I have a handicapped placard and they just ay thats good because you need it too i hope this helps to make you feel less guilty for thinking on the placard aspect it will also conserve her energy so that her fetigue does not cause her excessive pain i have gotten pain with fetigue since i was young good luck and a hello to D from a far away CP friend
We have one for my daughter and got it when she was 4 years at that point she was walking but often holding my hand and fatigued very quickely. Carrying her with bags in tow was too much.
It was a hard day when I went to apply for it and it broke my heart to see her PT had checked off the category stating her condition was life long (I knew she had CP but it still burned).
Fast forward to now and she is 6 is is much better on her feet but still tires. We don't use her pass all the time but we do find it handy in busy places (Costco I use it all the time). I do try to find a close available spot first.
I just tell myself how many people have a pass due extreme obesity or lung disease from a lifetime of smoking our children are not the way they are because poor lifestyle choices.
Get the pass, you can use it just in case.
well said busy lizy mom it is so true Sharon should not feel bad to get one and you should not feeel bad that your lil girls conditon is life long either.
i have Cp and it is just normal for me i don't want people to feel bad for me it is me and I am happy the way i am most of the time lol just like any other person right
I thought readers might also enjoy this story: http://blog.kennedykrieger.org/2011/03/get-a-grip/
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